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Showing posts with the label self development

Be New Every Single Day

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All progress comes from our being new.. A musician keeps singing new songs.. An engineer keeps innovating new designs. A scientist keeps carrying out new experiments. You don't have to carry over the past with you everyday you wake up. Be new every single day. Don't be the same old person you were yesterday.. It's only when you're new every day that you experience miracles. The past is usually a burden to us and when we stop letting it drag us behind, we become free to experience the beautiful things in the new. Many people are stuck with either the good or bad experiences of their past that they cannot even live. When you keep thinking about the past, you keep reliving it in your mind and you miss the beautiful opportunities to experience greater things which the present always offers you. Many other people who have accomplished certain notable things in their lives tend to feel that they are complete or that they have arrived. Once you start think...

6 Things You Can Give Which Cost Nothing

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A few days back, I was having a little chit chat with some of my colleagues at work and one of them was all about how he wanted to make so much money so that he can give it to his loved ones to make them happy. The way he kept laying emphasis on that made me suspect that he probably thought that giving those people money was the only way he could show that he cared about them. Well, I had to commend his desire to make millions: it was a good thing, however, I kinda let him see other ways he could also show his care presently before he made those millions. We live in a world where so many people are crazed about making money at all costs. Some of us think that money is everything. Money is definitely important and believe me, I also desire to have tons of it, but a life with lots of money without meaning, without purpose, without love would be quite boring. Forgive me for digressing from the main topic. Here are the 6 other things you can give to people which cost you nothin...

Do It Irrespective Of Acceptance

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Many people today care too much about being accepted by others at any cost. They give up on their values, their ambitions, their morality and even their own peace of mind just for acceptance. It's a natural thing for a human being to desire to be accepted by other people. However, it must never be to the detriment of that individual. You cannot displease yourself or put yourself at a disadvantage because you want to be accepted. A lot of people have given up on doing the positive things they are genuinely passionate about doing because they want to be accepted and they care about how others perceive what they are doing. The secret that most winners know is that irrespective of whether people like what they do or not, as long as it is something good and they are passionate about doing it continuously; they care less about how people see it. When you are convinced of exactly what you want to do and you know deep down in your conscience that it is a good thing, go ahead an...

The Hoarders Mentality

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A lot of people have this tendency of hoarding things and always keeping unnecessary stuff to themselves. They find it difficult to let things they don't need anymore go. Rather than let someone else have it, they prefer to hoard it. This is what I call the hoarders mentality. A hoarder is more like a miserly person. He or she believes that it will never be enough for them and will continue to save up unnecessary things. But this is a big trap and demonstrates a poor mindset. Winners know and believe that they will never run dry. This doesn't mean that they waste their resources, rather they aren't afraid to let go of the things they no longer need. And indeed, they never run dry. Beliefs are incredibly powerful. Many of the things some of us still keep with ourselves aren't needed anymore by us, yet we just leave them with us for no good reason. You go to some homes, you find a large box filled with old clothes that are no longer in use. Why not share? You b...

Living In The Now Maybe Bullshit

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You hear it almost everywhere these days. They say you should live in the now, you stay present and feel the moment. They say you should forget about the past and the future but enjoy the beauty that always comes with the present. You hear stuff like this almost all the time don't you? Well, that's the new age idea that many people are beginning to buy.  And if it's not well understood, those people will not see the hidden bullshit idea they're buying. When they preach "Live in the now," "Live in the present moment," "Feel the present moment," I think the point they're trying to make is that we should be more conscious of whatever we're presently doing, so we can achieve the best results. When you're working on something very important for example, you're a surgeon carrying out an operation or you're a soldier in war facing live gun fire or maybe you're a scientist carrying out an experiment or a fast dr...

Stop Watching TV Like A Zombie

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These days, a lot of people are spending more and more time glued to their TV's, laptops or mobile devices watching various programs continuously. Unknowingly, they're gradually turning themselves into zombies if they don't stop this bad habit. Our television sets weren't designed to be watched almost every time. They were designed for our entertainment and it's up to us to plan ourselves accordingly as regards how much entertainment we need to be getting from it. However, the use of TV has been greatly abused as more people are losing control of it and consequently it's turning most of them into unproductive people. Come to think about it, what exactly do you really gain from spending too much time watching TV? If you think about it well enough, you will find out that your rarely gain much asides from fleeting excitement, laughter or some new information about something. And you only get the latter benefit when you're watching something educationa...

A Better Way To Study

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When we talk about study, what usually comes to mind is reading books. What did you think this article was about? You probably thought I was going to write about ways to read more effectively. Well, this article aims to point out a better way of studying other than just reading. To begin with, the word study, according to the Oxford English Dictionary means: "The devotion of time and attention to gaining knowledge of an academic subject, especially by means of books." Take note of the last line: "…especially" by means of books. In other words, it means that there are other means you can study asides books. The second definition from the same dictionary says "A detailed investigation and analysis of a subject or situation." This definition seems to be much closer to what I'm writing about. Deep emphasis on "detailed investigation and analysis." Knowledge is everywhere around us. And if only we can pay some attention to many things ha...

Jealousy And Praise Are Pointers To Your Success Path

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Jealousy and praise are two sides of the same coin. They are both emotions arising out of the same thing which is achievement. In a competitive world however, where many are trapped in mediocrity, it's easier for other people to get jealous about what you've achieved and you may tend to perceive their envy negatively instead of seeing it as a pointer to your path of success. Take some time to reflect over your life and figure out the things that you're often praised about. Maybe it's your dexterity in fixing up technical stuff, maybe it's how good looking you are, maybe it's how sweet your food tastes, it could be how well you play a particular sport or even how well you speak, dance and perform on stage. Whatever it is, try to write them down. Also think about the things that make other people envy you. Write them down too in a separate list. In many cases you will figure out lots of similarities in the two lists. But the point of this exercise is to br...

Easiest Way To Win People Over

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Many little things happen in our daily lives, most of which has a way of guiding us to the truth if only we pay some attention to it. I paid attention to one of those things and it inspired me to write this blog post. I learnt something new from a pretty young lady Lara, who recently joined a support group for bloggers of various categories of which I was already an existing member. I was inspired with the way she joined the group; the actions she took and her good communication which won the admiration of many of us. How was she able to do this? Usually, most newbies to the bloggers group often just introduce themselves briefly and start bombarding the platform with various links to visit their blogs. But Lara's approach was different and that made her stand out. When Lara joined the group, the first thing she said was: "Hi, I'm Lara, nice to meet you all" and after a few responses, she proceeded with "Where do you guys blog at?" This question was...

Why You Shouldn't Take Mockery Seriously

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I have an awesome friend called Dave.  Dave is smart, intelligent and very funny. He is full of life, energy and fun. Whenever I'm around him,  I laugh a lot alongside some of his other friends. When Dave talks and you're looking at him, you'd  rarely notice his dentition isn't pretty nice because you'll be lost in his words. Despite the way his set of teeth looked, Dave was never shy to speak, to crack his humorous jokes and just be a happy guy to be around with. He wasn't limited by it. He only smiled and cracked a joke about anyone who makes a comment about his teeth. He wasn't hiding it. He didn't let it make him stop being himself. In contrast, I learnt about another guy who also had bad dentition. As expected, he was constantly jeered at by his peers because of that. This guy took it to heart, and rarely spoke in public. In his photos, he rarely smiled because he didn't want anyone to notice the way his teeth looked. He became restrai...

Not Always About What You Think

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A bold winner must always put into consideration the fact that things may not be exactly as he/she thinks. You may have ideals and beliefs about something, but be careful enough to consider what other people think about it as well before accepting or concluding your own assertions of what's true. Often times, we make the mistake of thinking that we're always right and what we believe is true. That makes us arrogant and indifferent to other people's point of view. We must avoid that by first trying to get a balanced perspective of things. From there we can make well informed decisions on what to believe or act upon. Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's Ted Talk on the "Danger of a Single Story" points out the importance of gaining that balanced view of things. You can see the enlightening video here on YouTube: Make it a priority to always gather information from extensive and diverse sources before making a decision to believe anything or act upon it. It ...

Learn To Be Proud of Yourself

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"I messed up in that exam today," "I'm not good enough," "I'm useless," "I can't achieve it," "They're better than me," "I'm a failure," "I'm not worth it," All these thoughts go round and round the minds of different people in different places across the globe every single day. It's not that these thoughts pay or that they are beneficial to anyone. It's just that many people have formed the habit of thinking that way and seeing themselves that way. That's why we have many unhappy people today, all those kinds of thought keep going on in their heads. But I want every one of you to think about this article I shared on my Facebook timeline and make changes to your thought process and lifestyle: ________ When last did you tell yourself that you were proud of yourself? When last did you say to yourself.. "I'm (Name) and I'm damn proud of myself." Ask yours...

In All You Do, Don't Be Fake!

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Meet Miss.X on social media, she looks pretty, charming and larger than life. But meeting her in real life, she's far from what she portrays herself as. She's been editing most of her pictures just to look good online. Someone might have been genuinely interested in her if she wasn't afraid of showing herself the way she is online. But when they meet her in real life, they are disappointed that it's all fake. Meet Mr. Y, he portrays himself online as a Big businessman into foreign merchandise while he is actually still actively looking for jobs. He barely manages to feed himself from his daily wages as a laborer. Some people may have viewed his profile and might have wanted to help him.. But well he is assumed to be comfortable and he loses his chances. You're working for a boss who treats you like crap, has no respect for you and gives no damn about your welfare. Deep down, you're unhappy with his attitude and you resent his methods. But instead of lett...

After Reading This, Your Brain Will Not Remain The Same

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I just came across this video on YouTube and I really think it has a wonderful content to be shared here on the bold winner's blog. Dr. Lara Boyd, a researcher in neuroscience and neurobiology who established the Brain Behavior Lab had some very interesting facts to share with us about the human brain. Contrary to what we thought, the brain doesn't stop changing or developing at a certain age. The brain constantly changes it's shape, chemical processes and patterns regularly. And these changes are determined mainly by our individual behaviors. If we choose to change our brains, we must change our actions, what we do, where we go to, what we listen to, what we see around us. There is no quick fix or drug to enhance neuroplasticity(the ability of your brain to reorganize itself and form new neural connections) than to change your behavior. An interesting fact is that there is a degree of variability playing a great role in her research. The rates of neuroplastic...

The Good Kind Of Selfishness

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If we are all to tell ourselves the truth, we are all selfish beings. You may tend to disagree only because you've associated selfishness to connote something negative. But selfishness has positive sides to it. We all have our own personal wants and desires.. We may want to go to heaven, come first in a competition; become richer, prettier or more knowledgeable than someone else. We may want to fall in love with a particular person rather than another etc. All these are selfish interests and no matter how we want to deny that fact, it still stares us in the face that for every action we take, we do it for a purpose. However, the actions we take to achieve our selfish interests is what determines if the selfishness involved is a good kind or a bad kind. When we use negative means to achieve our desires, the selfishness is a negative one. When we use positive means acceptable to our conscience and fellow human beings to actualize our selfish interests, the selfishness is ...

Deal With Social Media Envy!

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You log on to Facebook or Instagram, you are bamboozled with different pictures and images uploaded by your friends. They all seem to be having a good time and enjoying themselves. He takes a picture with his brand new car, she posts a picture where she's chilling with her fiance, there's a picture of your friends having fun at a party or get together last night. All these kind of pictures are flashed on social media on a daily basis. For some people, they tend to start feeling bad about their own selves when they see these pictures. They wonder, 'Why isn't it me?' 'Why am I not the one having this much fun?' 'Why am I not the owner of that brand new car or house?' It becomes a problem for these people. They always compare themselves with what they see on social media and they start feeling bad when it appears they don't have what they see. They easily forget that most people only post their best pictures online and that they don...

Take Time To Work On Self

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Take time to work on yourself, other things will naturally follow.  It is pointless to always try to change other things because we do not have full control over everything. But we can have full control over what we do and therefore it is most critical that we take time to develop ourselves and train our mindsets to put us in a right frame of mind to be able to face the challenges of life. You cannot fully control the government, other people , your environment or your peculiar challenges, but you can control yourself and how you react to the things you encounter. You find out that having a greater control over yourself and what you do helps you to be able to navigate through life with ease. You do not bother much about the actions of other people, because you understand that if you can be the best version of yourself, you are already changing the world in your own little way. Changing the world or making it a better place doesn't have to be hard, you don't force pe...

The Best Way To Command Attention

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A lecturer once came into a class to teach, he started dictating notes for the students and at some point, the class started getting noisy. "Keep Quiet," He yelled and continued dictating his notes. The class became very boring and in a very short time, students became noisy and uninterested again. Some of them started fiddling with their phones and stuff. The lecturer got angry and left the class. Another lecturer came into the same class and started to teach. He had no notes and he made every student feel at ease with his jokes. He never told them to keep quiet, the students naturally had to keep quiet because they found him interesting. It was easy to learn from his simple manner of teaching coupled with some cool jokes once in a while. The class was quiet most of the time as the lecturer effortlessly commanded their attention. A man walks into a social gathering and starts expecting everyone to pay attention to him, he has got nothing interesting to say and he sou...

Thoughts On Extremism

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I was inspired to write this article because I realised that some persons are beginning to associate extremism with a particular religion or a particular group of people. Stereotypes have been created to fit certain innocent persons who belong to a particular tribe or religion as extremists. This is doing more harm than good in today's world. An extremist is one who has zero tolerance for the views and perspectives of other people asides his own beliefs. He's ready to defend it it any way and finds it difficult to agree with anybody who thinks otherwise. Extremists usually believe that no other opinion apart from theirs is valid. This makes things very difficult for progressives who try to see things from different angles. I do not think any religion or race has monopoly over extremism. Anyone who fits into the aforementioned description above is an extremist. It is wrong therefore to brand all adherents of a particular religion or group as extremists or terrorists beca...

Social Media Is Becoming Real To Us

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Some days ago, a friend of mine told me that she wasn't happy with me because I didn't write a detailed birthday message on her Facebook timeline. Just saying Happy Birthday to her wasn't enough. And she was quite serious about it until I decided to write something special about her on her Facebook wall. On Whatsapp groups, I've seen friends get into intense arguments which gradually starts becoming offensive or even abusive. To the extent that the parties involved get actually angry with themselves and this leads to some petty personal issues. I've seen people fall in love on social media easily. Just through chatting with one another. And you begin to wonder how something which wasn't so real to us like the internet started becoming a part of our lives, our psychology and our emotions. People compare their number of likes, followers and etcetera on social media. Some can decide to do things they wouldn't naturally do simply to gain some approval ...